During my high school years, I church shopped. My family was a member of a Congregational United Church of Christ congregation. I was curious to learn about other faiths. In Lincoln, Nebraska, in the 1960s that was not an exploration of world religions, but of churches ~ Salvation Army, African Methodist Episcopal, Catholic, Quaker, Presbyterian, Lutheran, and Unitarian Universalists.
Literature I loved was used as scripture at the UU church. Issues of the day were discussed. Members of the Music Department at the University of Nebraska played in the Sunday Services – string quartets, flute, harpsichord, piano. My need for a religion that felt beautiful, relevant and authentic was met.
I attended irregularly during my college years. After college, I was in the Peace Corps in the Fiji Islands. Upon my return, I again began attending the Unitarian Universalist congregation. As a then young adult, I liked knowing people older who had found their way through some of the life changes I was in the midst of.
When I became a mother of young children, the UUs had a parent support group. Questions about parenting and family life were discussed. Play groups formed. I made friends.
Once I was a member, I was asked to take a turn brewing the coffee and hosting the snack table. Then I was asked to be part of a teaching team in one of the religious education classes.
Feminism and the Women’s Movement engaged me. I attended a Unitarian Universalist Women and Religion Conference. A women’s spirituality group formed in our congregation. We discussed the male language and imagery for God and the exclusion of women’s experience and leadership in religion. Each of us had turns to speak and we listened to one another. We read women theologians, created rituals to mark passages in our lives and became good friends.
I took an adult education class Building Your Own Theology. People who saw the world differently than I did shared their beliefs and dis-beliefs. Sometimes my own thinking changed. Even if I didn’t share their theologies, I came to understand how their lives had brought them to their understanding, and I saw how their beliefs worked for them.
I met interesting people. I met a few real characters too. And over time as I got to know them, I grew to love them.
During these years, I was a high school English teacher. I was working on a paper on the gender imbalance in the literature studied in schools. I was invited to offer a sermon at my UU congregation. Speaking in the Sunday Service felt like a huge honor and accomplishment. I remember thinking what can top this? Will I someday preach in French? I never have.
Members saw leadership potential in me. I was nominated to the Board of Trustees and then later elected President. Former Presidents mentored me. I grew. As President, my participation in the church was with the beautiful and the basic ~ should the parking lot be asphalt or concrete?
When I first made a pledge to the church, I remember thinking how much does a movie ticket cost? I’ll give that much a week to the church.
I saw a member who anytime any good cause came up, quickly took out her checkbook and wrote a check. She always looked happy as she gave ~ a big smile on her face and her eyes lit up. Linda was a single parent of two young children and worked as a pharmacist at the local hospital. She lived moderately, simply and abundantly. She gave generously. UUs, like Linda, walk the talk and put their money where their hearts are.
Learning from Linda, each year I stepped up my giving. The church meant much more to me than a movie.
My giving to the church now is 10% of my income. I pledge $6,000. Together Bill and I pledge $12,000 to this congregation. I say this with a smile on my face and my eyes alight.
People work and earn money and then sometimes give it away.
All of us get asked by countless worthy causes to give.
When I give, what makes me give?
If you are like me, you give for a lot of reasons.
Sometimes I give because I feel pressured or guilty. The money goes to do good, but I don’t feel good.
Sometimes I give because there’s a need and it’s apparent and I respond. My giving can be kind of fickle, arbitrary, based on my mood. Sometimes I give to be recognized, to do as my peers do, because I like to see my name on a list or receive the pledge gift. I give sometimes because I am expected to give.
Sometimes I give because I want to help. I feel responsible.
I give when I appreciate the good case somebody makes for their cause. I get caught up in their energy. I want them to make their goal. I want what the organizations want to be fulfilled.
I give to be a good liberal, yes, supporting liberal causes, but also to be liberal. Liberal means open-handed, generous.
I give because I like the idea of not just private gain but giving for common good. I’d rather have art museums than a private collection of paintings. I’d rather give to a beautiful common home, a church, than my own personal one.
I give when I’m in a place of knowing how much I have, when I feel good and over flowing. I give to share.
I give sometimes to bring a smile to someone’s face, to bring surprise, delight, pleasure.
I give to be creative to see my resources join with others to do something good.
UUs walk the talk. Unitarian Universalists are leaders in civil rights, peace work, women’s rights, LBGT rights, climate justice and immigration justice. UUs are active in service in the community and in social action.
This congregation gives beyond itself and is known to the Greater Richmond Interfaith Program and the Richmond Emergency Food Pantry as their BIGGEST non-profit donors.
I give because of moments like yesterday when 30 people from here joined with our interfaith partners in an immigration justice vigil at the jail. We want for others what we want for ourselves – jobs, education, time with our families, acceptance. We want our country to live up to its ideals and be a land of opportunity for everybody.
I give to this congregation because we walk our talk and we put our money where our hearts are. This congregation is stepping up and forward to live our values in the world, and we create here a religious community of worship, education and care for one another.
We come here to be reminded of how we want to live and what’s most important. We show up and keep coming. We are accepted for who we are and encouraged to be our best selves. We have fun together, try new things, risk and grow. We stay connected when we are in conflict. As Rebecca Parker, President of Starr King School for the Ministry says about paradise, real community is not free of suffering or conflict. Real community is a place where the spirit is present and love is possible.
Here members speak on coming out as sexual beings, tell our stories of addiction and recovery, of family life, of life after retirement and the joys and challenges of aging. The church sustains and supports us through our daily lives and in each chapter of our lives.
I give to this community because there’s no other place where I so regularly get to be with people decades younger and decades older than I am.
When you see a baby blessed here, doesn’t it just bring a smile to your face? Don’t you feel reminded of what a blessing life is? Don’t you feel an up-swelling of sweetness?
You want, of course, to live a long and healthy life, but wouldn’t you just love to have your life commemorated here and celebrated by these people? Wouldn’t you like at your memorial service to hear this magnificent choir sing? Well, you won’t hear them…but others. Wouldn’t you like to have the experiences and essence of your life turned into poetry?
Together we are on a life journey of becoming more grateful, more generous, more loving.
The best giving for me is when I give because of the gratitude and love I feel. I want life’s blessings to flow through me and out to others. I don’t want to block them. I don’t want them stuck. I want to convert them into music, singing, a well-tended building and grounds, clean, safe classrooms, childcare.
This church to be all it can be needs you.
This congregation is the community of ourselves. We all are responsible for its health and well-being, for the fulfillment of the congregation’s mission.
Many of you model for me grateful, generous living. I see you take out your checkbooks, your wallets and I learn from you, giving, receiving as love show us how.
You give because it is who you are, liberal, open-handed, generous people.
You give to support the common good.
You walk your talk. You give where your heart is.
I hope today you will give because it feels good.
I hope you will give and bring a smile to your face and to many faces.
Your gift matters. You matter. You are appreciated.
One year on Celebration Sunday, we wanted to ignite people’s spirits. We invited fire jugglers. Paper banners were streaming from these beams. Balls of fire were swung on ropes. Each swing bringing the flames a little closer to the paper banners. The fire dance nearly put the fear of God into us. Nobody slept through that service.
Today we simply say to you ~ We love you. We appreciate you. The congregation needs you. You are the congregation. Step up, step forward.
You, your time, your voice, your presence, your money give life-bestowing blessings.
We are all connected. We depend upon one another. We are woven together in the web of all life through the power of love.
Love, grace, goodness be with you and flow through you ~ now and always.
Copyright © 2013, Rev. Barbara Hamilton-Holway. All Rights Reserved.
