The theme of next year’s GA, “From Promise to Commitment,” lifts up crucial questions for all UUs. What promises are we willing to make one another? What does it take to follow through on them? Unlike many religious communities, we are a covenant based faith, not a creedal one. What holds us together is how we seek to treat one another and the world. Our principles and purposes name the values we affirm and promote. So the question of what we are able to do together is central.
Those shared values are a source of strength. Yet if you’ve served on one single committee or working group, here or anywhere, you know the challenges. Even people with similar core values can feel stymied by the differences that naturally arise when trying to forge agreements and action plans to move forward.
How we solve this problem has become one area of specialization in my community ministry of spiritual direction. For years now, I’ve been intensively studying and teaching Compassionate Communication, also known as Non-Violent Communication (NVC), a worldwide movement focusing on conflict resolution based on the belief that everyone’s needs matter. It’s a profound spiritual practice!
The processes and language of NVC can radically impact the level of commitment groups are able to generate. Effective commitment requires crafting a broadly supported consensus which is also backed by energy and enthusiasm. It’s often a real challenge to have both! The processes of NVC bring into the open the differences which are separating people and can transform the judgments, fears and assumptions which hold back movement. These tools open the way to finding workable solutions that everyone can support, releasing the energy of the community to live into its commitments.
I’m excited that this year Intern Minister Marcus Leifert, Family Minister Amy Moses-Lagos and I will be leading three full day (10:00 a.m. – 4:00 p.m.) Saturday workshops on Compassionate Communication here at UUCB: Nov. 17, Feb. 16 and May 18. There is no charge for church members. Details to follow in This Week at UUCB. We hope to see many of you for this workshop series.
